


I’ve Known Everything Since I First Saw You

by doojoon



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alcohol, Alternate Universe - College/University, M/M, One-Sided Attraction, Pining, ten is the catalyst for yet another gay crisis but like honestly can u blame him
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-05
Updated: 2018-04-10
Packaged: 2019-04-18 14:58:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,304
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14215650
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/doojoon/pseuds/doojoon
Summary: Ten's a cocktease who doesn't know it and Youngho is his weak, unsuspecting victim.





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> please go easy on me, i haven't written anything in a million years (title from bds)

It all starts the day of Youngho’s last midterm, a three-hour econ exam that was particularly mind-numbing. Youngho heads to Yuta’s apartment with the sole intent of crashing on the couch and playing video games with his best friend into the early hours of the morning in celebration of surviving the first quarter of their second year of college. He expects it to be like any of the many Friday nights they’ve spent together, stuffing themselves full of junk food and beer, screaming a little too loud at each other when one of them fucks up a mission in _Call of Duty_. What he definitely does not expect is the half-naked boy who opens the door after Youngho bangs his fist against it upon his arrival.

“Hi there!” Youngho is greeted by the beaming smile and dark twinkling eyes of the most beautiful boy he's ever laid eyes on.

“Uh,” Youngho lets out, trying not to let his eyes wander over the expanse of smooth, hard skin presented to him. There’s a towel slung over the boy’s shoulder, damp black hair shining under the harsh fluorescents, hair which makes a reappearance a few inches below his belly button and disappears beneath the low-slung jeans resting on his hips. The boy tilts his head slightly as Youngho remains in a silent daze before slowly pulling the door open further and stepping back into the apartment.

“Er, are you one of Yuta’s friends? I’m Ten. Just moved in,” the boy says brightly. Youngho just stares, trying to place the boy’s face. The boy lets out a confused sigh while raising his eyebrows, which seems to be an attempt to get Youngho to do something, move, speak, _anything_ , and Youngho tries to decide if this is a post-exam, stress-induced hallucination. Youngho continues his contemplation instead of replying as he steps cautiously through the doorway, looking for clues to tell him if he is, in fact, currently dreaming.

The boy looks on expectantly, still waiting for a response to his question that has yet to come. Just as Youngho has made up his mind to pinch the kid to determine whether he is an actual physical presence (solely in the interest of his mental health; this has nothing to do with the glistening abs just feet away from his fingertips), Yuta comes trundling out of his room, hitting his leg on the edge of a cardboard box and wincing as he makes his way through the living room.

“Hey, man,” Yuta says, stooping over to rub his injured shin. A small frown flickers across Yuta’s face. “Why do you look like you’re about to pounce on Ten?” Youngho finally snaps out of his trance, now somewhat convinced of his reality as he glances around the room and sees boxes full of clothes, books, and what looked like an odd assortment of stuffed animals and sports equipment. Youngho takes a step back from Ten after he realizes exactly how close he’s standing to the other boy.

" _Sorry_ ,” he mouths at Ten with a wince, who winks back at him. Youngho thinks he might cry.

“Since when do you have a new roommate?” Youngho asks, ignoring Yuta’s question artfully, tearing his eyes away from Ten.

“I told you last week, dude. We were halfway through our Miyazaki marathon; right after you were done squealing about how cute the little ash balls in _Spirited Away_ are.” Youngho flips his gaze to Yuta once again as his brain scrambles to recollect such events.

“Wasn’t that the night I woke up on the kitchen floor curled around a potted plant that neither of us owned?” Youngho replies thoughtfully. He has no idea how Yuta expected him to remember such a minute detail after so much soju, but then again, Youngho should know by now that Yuta remembering to tell him anything ever, no matter either’s level of intoxication, was a feat in itself.

“That’s the one,” Yuta says fondly. “This is Ten. He’s Taeyong’s friend from high school. Had a roommate from hell, so I thought I’d take him under my wing this semester.”

Ten flashes a blinding smile Youngho’s way before offering a hand to shake. “Nice to meet you. Youngho, right? Yuta mentioned you earlier today, I think,” Ten says as he clasps Youngho’s hand, who is busy trying to ignore the shock of warmth that shivered through his body at the touch (along with just how sweaty his own palms are feeling right now).

“Um. Yeah. Nice to meet you, too.” Youngho tries not to think about what Yuta possibly could have said about him. “Sorry I completely blanked on you there, I just finished the hardest exam of my life,” Youngho stutters out. Because yes, exactly, his speechlessness had been due solely to his lack of sleep and potential failure. It could not be contributed in the slightest to the living, breathing angel standing in Youngho’s wake.

“That’s awful! I had my last midterm yesterday, so I feel your pain,” Ten says as he tugs at the towel around his neck. “Glad you made it out alive, though! I’m gonna go finish changing, but I’ll make some food afterwards. Kimchi fried rice good for everyone?” Youngho nods dumbly at Ten’s retreating figure, eyes on the curve of Ten’s ass, as Yuta enthusiastically states his approval. Once Ten is safely in the kitchen, Yuta takes one look at his best friend and narrows his eyes, mouthing an admonishing “ _no_ ,” and Youngho prays to the highest of heavens that Ten is straight. Has horrible hidden habits. Is an awful person.

Ten’s cooking is the best thing Youngho has ever tasted; Ten spends the rest of the evening cleaning and talking about his latest community service project, generally being a flawless specimen of the male gender, and that’s when Youngho knows he’s fucked.

  

☤

 

Unfortunately for Youngho, Ten continues to be nothing but the most cheerful and kind person he’s ever met, and makes food for Youngho whenever he’s at the apartment. Even more unfortunately for Youngho, Ten is also an oblivious cocktease.

Fridays have always been reserved ceremoniously as “bro nights” by Yuta, and the week after Youngho first meets Ten, he finds himself the makeshift pillow for Ten’s sleeping figure an hour and a half into some foreign flick Yuta picked out (“ _I’m just trying to broaden my horizons, okay?_ ”). As hard as Youngho tries to keep his distance from Ten, it seems as though Ten is attempting just the opposite ten times over; Youngho has never once in his life met someone so prone to skinship as Ten is. Youngho constantly finds a foot gliding against his under the kitchen table, an arm slung over his shoulders as soon as he walks through the door, and a chin pressed to the top of his head as curious eyes gaze at his laptop screen.  With Ten, a sense of personal space is nonexistent, and tonight is clearly no exception.

As soon as he feels Ten’s head hit his shoulder, warm, steady breath washing over his chest, Youngho finds himself in a desperate battle to keep his eyes pinned to the TV screen. Youngho can feel Yuta’s eyes staring daggers at him relentlessly, and makes all attempts to appear ignorant of his friend’s gaze. Youngho thinks back to the conversation they’d had the day before, praying that Ten would wake up and move away from him.

 

☤

 

“No. You can’t have him. He’s a baby; I refuse to let you defile his virgin soul,” Yuta hisses at Youngho that Thursday evening after spotting Ten’s hand trail across the back of Youngho’s t-shirt in passing.

“It’s not me, I swear! Honestly, he never stops touching me, and I can’t just pretend like it doesn’t happen,” Youngho cries, trying to keep his voice down, and he really is telling the truth. Ten comes onto him as heavily as a wasted chick in a bar at closing time would, but with the intent of a baby bunny. It’s the most perplexing and frustrating experience Youngho has ever been through, and the number of hard-ons Youngho wakes up to these days is increasing rapidly.

“Listen to me. Ten’s a natural flirt; everyone knows it except for him. So I don’t give a fuck if he takes his dick out and waves it in front of your face. You cannot hook up with him and then break his heart,” Yuta says.

“Just because my track record isn’t fantastic—” Youngho is cut off by a scoffing Yuta.

“You haven’t stayed with one person for more than two weeks in all the time I’ve know you, Youngho. You have the attention span of a butterfly and the romanticism of a three year-old boy.”

“Okay, but—” Yuta stops Youngho once again, twirling a pencil between his fingers before pointing it like a sword to Youngho’s face.

“I don’t care. Keep your dirty hands off of him. Go seduce someone else, you heathen,” Yuta growls, bopping Youngho on the nose with the eraser end of his pencil. Youngho has nothing to say to that, so he slouches in his seat, rubbing the end of his nose with a wince, and tries not to think about the touches seared into his skin just moments ago by light, dancing fingers.

 

☤

 

Youngho sighs as he remembers and bites his lip hard enough to hurt. Why, oh why, must such an unfair situation be bestowed upon him? Youngho is a good kid: he does his homework, tries not to fight, recycles. Sometimes he even remembers to call home and check in with his family. So what has he done to deserve the absolute hell of having a beautiful, off-limits boy pressed up against his side? Youngho knows, he _knows_ that he would treat Ten differently than any of the significant others (if they could even be referred to as such, for how shortly they were together) Youngho has had. For one, Youngho's grown up a lot since his freshman year full of drunken hookups--but there's just something so captivating about Ten, beyond how gorgeous he is.

  
He always seems legitimately interested in what Youngho has to say, even if it seems stupid to Youngho himself, and Youngho feels so content whenever he's with Ten--comfortable, even. Being with Ten reminds him of the safety of his home, thousands of miles away (well, when Youngho isn't freaking out internally about how he's falling in love, that is).

But that doesn’t matter to Yuta, and it sure as hell doesn’t matter to Ten, who, according to Yuta, hits on anything that moves without realizing it. Youngho closes his eyes as Ten shifts in his slumber to throw a hand over Youngho’s waist, trying to remember the prayers for repentance he learned in Sunday school when he was little. Were there even prayers for such a thing? Youngho can’t recall, which probably has to do with the fact he’d spent the majority of his time in church asleep. Regardless, Youngho desperately tries to think of anything other than the deliciously warm body lying against him. Ten’s hand fists into Youngho’s shirt just as Youngho finally shifts his focus back to the movie, and that’s the last straw. Youngho stands up quickly, half-shoving Ten off of his shoulder.

“Wh.. wha…?” Ten mumbles sleepily, rubbing his eye with a balled-up fist. “Is the movie over?”

“No,” Youngho replies, determinedly not making eye contact with Ten’s adorable, confused self, and speed-walks over to the door. “I just remembered… I have to be up early tomorrow. A project. Homework. Stuff.” _There_. Youngho congratulates himself on the lie, mentally patting himself on the back for such a quick and convincing tale, and pretends he doesn’t see Yuta rolling his eyes from the La-Z-Boy on the other side of the room.

Ten lets out a sad little whine, and Youngho presses his lips together and looks up to the ceiling, suppressing a scream of sexual frustration. “I’ll see you guys later,” he calls over his shoulder with a hurried wave. The end of his sentence is cut off by the slamming of the door behind him. Youngho makes his way home, doing his best to ignore the fact that he’s half hard before giving up once he reaches his apartment and jerking off to the thoughts of Ten laid out beneath him, moaning Youngho’s name.

 

☤

  

Despite his best intentions, Youngho ends up at Yuta and Ten’s apartment once again three days later after basketball practice. He’s covered in sweat and his shoulders are aching from the drills they did earlier, and he makes the fatal error of mentioning this to Ten.

“Oh, let me give you a massage. My mom told me I’m really good at them,” Ten chirps, and before Youngho can get a word in edgewise, Ten is pressed up behind him, his fingers digging into Youngho's shoulders.

“How’s this?” Ten says against Youngho’s ear, and Youngho groans out an unintelligible sound. Ten laughs. “I’ll take that as positive.” Youngho nods, letting his head loll forward as Ten moves his thumbs in circles at the base of his neck.

“So how was practice? I’ve never seen you play before,” Ten asks conversationally.

“It was fine, I guess. Just painful,” Youngho manages, his voice muffled by the front of his t-shirt. He’s actually one of the best on his team, but he doesn’t spend enough time practicing to really reach his potential—at least, that’s what his coach always says. Sure, Youngho’s attendance record for practice isn't the _greatest_ , but he’s a college kid with a million things to balance on his plate, including an increasingly intense crush on the boy right behind him. Ten presses his knuckles against a particularly large knot at the junction of Youngho’s shoulder. Youngho groans, and can almost feel Ten’s smiling reaction.

“That’s good. You really should be more careful, though,” Ten says.

“It’s not this bad usually, today was just really tough,” Youngho mumbles into the palm of his hand as he tries very hard to focus his mind on anything other than the touch of Ten’s hands.

“You need to take care of yourself, Youngho. I’d be sad if anything happened to you,” Ten replies, and Youngho can feel the tips of his ears growing red.

“Uh… yeah. I’ll try,” Youngho replies in a strangled voice, sucking in a particularly deep breath as Ten scratches his nails lightly through the hair at the base of Youngho’s head.

“Promise?” Ten whispers, his breath hitting squarely on the back of Youngho’s neck.

“Um. Yes,” Youngho says, his fingers moving down to clench against the soft material of his sweatpants.

“Good. I’ll have to come see you at one of your next games. I can be your own personal cheerleader!” Ten hits lightly down Youngho’s back before resting at his hips, toying with the edge of Youngho’s t-shirt.

“Ye-yeah, that’d be great,” Youngho says in a strangled voice, trying desperately to ignore thoughts of Ten in a cheerleading outfit. Ten moves around to the front of him, a small smile playing on his lips.

“I bought some ddeokbokki earlier, want some?” Ten asks.

“Definitely.” Youngho clears his throat before replying his approval. He really wishes Yuta was in the room with them to diffuse the very one-sided sexual tension Youngho was currently experiencing. Ten stands up and moves away from the couch, and Youngho tries not to miss Ten’s touch, which proves to be a more difficult task than he anticipates. Everything that has to do with Ten is difficult (but at the same time, so, so easy), Youngho realizes, but he can’t seem to keep himself away. Ten busies himself with the package of ddeokbokki, humming a quiet tune as Youngho drags his homework out of his backpack.

“Here it is,” Ten says a few minutes later after pulling the ddeokbokki out of the microwave and plopping it on the kitchen table.

“Awesome,” Youngho says, snagging a toothpick from Ten when he’s offered one.

“Hey, you’re an Econ major, right?” Ten questions, glancing at Youngho’s textbook as he stabs a piece of fish cake before bringing it up to his lips and blowing to cool it down.

“Yeah, I am,” Youngho responds, training his eyes on the food in front of him. “Why?”

“I’m actually in the intro class this semester and I’ve been struggling some with the material.” Ten pops the bite in between his lips. “I don’t suppose you’d be willing to help me out? Just explaining some concepts and stuff, nothing huge—oh, whoops!” Ten frowns at the piece of ddeok he just barely managed to catch between his thumb and index finger after slipping off his toothpick. He tosses the ddeok into his mouth, letting out a small sound of irritation as he inspects the bright chili sauce now coating his fingers. “Anyway, would it be much of a bother for you?”

Youngho watches with glazed eyes as Ten slips his thumb inside his mouth, sucking the sauce off of the digit. Youngho’s eyes flicker between Ten’s mouth and eyes, which are staring back at him in question.

“Youngho?” Ten probes after he pulls his lips off of his thumb with a small popping sound. Youngho realizes just how desperately he needs to work on actually answering Ten’s questions when he asks them, instead of just staring at the boy like a dumbfounded toddler.

“Uh. Yep. I can totally do that. Absolutely,” Youngho says as he snaps out of the seemingly-endless reverie he tends to find himself under whenever he’s in Ten’s presence.

“Good,” Ten smiles back before slipping his index finger into his mouth. _Life_ , Youngho thinks, _is really, really unfair_.

 

☤

 

And so Youngho finds himself practically living with Ten and Yuta. He heads there after class to work on his own homework as well as answer any questions Ten has about his econ class. They play video games with Yuta, eat dinner, watch movies, and talk with each other. Once Youngho gets better at pretending Ten is a normal human being and not a god, he realizes how easy it is for the two of them to converse on all sorts of subjects—Ten’s childhood years in Thailand, Johnny’s family back in Chicago, and so much more.

The few moments Youngho spends at his own apartment or with other friends seem always to be interrupted by a phone call from Ten, begging for Youngho to come try his latest ramyun creation or explain a concept he couldn’t wrap his head around in class that day.

For reasons Youngho really can’t justify no matter how hard he tries, he finds himself agreeing in a heartbeat no matter how inconsequential the request. It’s so bad that Doyoung has taken to leaving multiple messages on Youngho’s phone every night, threatening blackmail if they don’t hang out for a period of time longer than 30 minutes soon. And Youngho wants to see his friend, he really, truly does—it’s just that, well, Ten _exists_.

The more time Youngho spends with Ten, the more he realizes that his initial infatuation has developed into something much more serious than lust, and Youngho possesses little self control, so he lets himself bask in Ten’s presence as often as possible. It’s physically and mentally exhausting, being around a person so incredibly attractive and kindhearted, but Youngho is a little bit of a masochist, so he does it anyway.

_yo. party at jaehyun’s this sat. i will murder u in ur sleep if you don’t show up, asshole._

Youngho glances at his buzzing phone briefly before explaining the efficient market hypothesis to Ten. He supposes a party couldn’t hurt him at this point, and Doyoung seems to be inching closer and closer to following through with his threat. Plus, maybe he’d find a boy to take home who could make him forget about Ten’s stupid, gorgeous smile and laugh that makes his stomach do somersaults.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> just let me live in my own little world where ten has a happy trail
> 
> let me know what you think in the comments! unbeta'd, so sorry for any errors.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> in which ten acquires an actual personality

Youngho’s phone buzzes repeatedly next to him on his bed, pulling him away from the new Netflix show he’s been binging. He scrambles to swipe past his lockscreen, realizing that Doyoung had texted him on and off for the past hour.

_u ready soon?_

_let’s head over there together in 30_

_youngho._

_pay attention for once in ur life and text me back_

_that’s it. i’m going by myself and u’ll just have to show up alone, and i know how much you hate going to parties w/o backup_

Youngho groans, quickly typing out a response and slamming his laptop shut. When had it gotten so late in the day? The last time he’d looked at the alarm clock that sits next to his bed, it read 7pm.

_SORRY sorry i got caught up_

_lots going on lately, you know_

_tons of work and obligations and such_

Before Youngho can even send his last message, he sees Doyoung typing a response. Youngho smirks. He isn’t the only one who hates going to parties solo.

_yeah fuckin right. get out of bed and be in front of my room in 10 minutes or i’m gone_

Youngho sighs and wonders why all of his friends are able to see right through him. Except for Ten, that is. He slides out of bed with a groan, swapping his sweatpants for a tight pair of black jeans Yuta said made his ass look good. He shrugs on a jacket, runs a hand through his hair (which he really needs to get cut, now that he thinks about it) before grabbing his keys and heading for the door. Making Doyoung wait longer than he deemed necessary is never a good idea.

“You’re late.” Doyoung narrows his eyes at Youngho after he locks the door to his apartment, giving Youngho’s body a cursory scan. “Why are you wearing your fuck me jeans? I thought your head was halfway up Ten’s ass at this point.”

Youngho shifts uncomfortably, rubbing his hands up and down his thighs to smooth out the material of his jeans. “My head’s not up his ass, man. That’s exactly the problem—I’m nowhere near his ass.”

“Jesus, Youngho. With the amount of time you spend talking about him I was sure I’d catch the two of you making out in a closet tonight,” Doyoung replies. The pair slip outside of Doyoung’s building, a cold breeze hitting Youngho’s face, making him shiver.

“Wait, he’s going tonight?” Youngho asks.

“Well, yeah, of course. You know how gone Yuta is for Jaehyun’s sister; do you really think he’d miss out on an opportunity to fumble around like a moron in front of her in an attempt to finally get into her pants?” Doyoung says. “He and Ten are gonna be late, but they’ll definitely be there.”

“Oh,” Youngho mumbles. Ten hadn’t told Youngho he was going. In fact, Youngho was planning on using the party as a distraction from his giant crush. Find a nice girl to spend the night with—someone without a smile that curled delicately across blinding white teeth or hands that burned Youngho’s skin at every touch. “Well, that’s nice, I guess. It’ll be good to see them.”

“You were at their apartment yesterday, Youngho. You see them all the time,” Doyoung replies, rolling his eyes. “But yeah, it is good they’ll be there. This is the perfect opportunity for you to finally get Ten to admit he likes you back.”

Youngho’s heart flutters at the thought, but he quickly tamps down the feeling. “It’s pretty clear he’s not interested. Yuta says he acts like that with everyone, not just me. I just have to figure out a way to get over him,” Youngho says with a sigh.

“Bullshit,” Doyoung says with a pop of his lips, emphasizing the word. “He’s into you. I’ve seen the two of you all over each other for weeks, now. You just have to make the move, Johnny boy.

Youngho laughs quietly at the nickname as they cross the street to Jaehyun’s house. “Thanks for the pep talk, man, but there’s no way. I don’t even think he knows I’m gay. Plus, there’s no chance in hell I’m actually his type—Ten’s not the kind of guy to like somebody like me,” Youngho says as they make their way up the sidewalk, the base of the music playing from the house already audible from where they stand. He didn’t know much about Ten’s past dating life— but the one picture Yuta showed him of Ten’s most recent ex told him all that mattered. A beautiful boy with soft, delicate features—a dancer, just like Ten—practically the exact opposite of Youngho.

“Oh my god, whatever,” Doyoung says exasperatedly, walking up the steps of the front porch. “Keep your pity party to yourself. I don’t know why I bother trying to help you, Youngho. You need to pull your head out of your _own_ ass, not just Ten’s.”

Youngho sighs as Doyoung pulls open the front door of the house, not bothering to knock. A wave of heat, blaring music, and loud voices hits him. He squares his shoulders, determinedly pushes the thought of Ten liking him back out of his mind, and walks inside.

 

  
☤

 

Not an hour later, Youngho finds himself with a drink in his hand and a frown on his face. He and Doyoung are standing in the living room with Taeyong, who is lamenting his earlier loss at badminton practice. Youngho offers his condolences silently, taking another sip of the sweet, syrupy liquid that fills his cup, and tries to smooth out his facial expression. Doyoung had mentioned that Ten and Yuta were coming to the party late, but Youngho still hasn’t seen either of them, and he’s had his eyes locked on the door ever since he walked through it himself.

“Can you believe that? I mean, seriously, what’s that kid’s problem? He thinks he can just flash his pearly whites down at me and act like the whole match didn’t just happen? Just because he’s new around here—he didn’t even know my _name_ ,” Taeyong whines. “He hardly speaks Korean! I—Youngho, are you even listening to me?” Taeyong whacks Youngho on the arm, causing Youngho to spill some of his drink on his hand.

“Shit,” Youngho says, wiping his sticky palm on his jeans. “Yeah, I heard you. Giant badminton boy’s got you all in a huff.”

“You’d be in a huff too if you’d seen the way he was acting around me. He actually tried to hug me after the match was over! The _audacity_ of some people—” Taeyong continues with venom in his voice before Doyoung cuts him off with a hand.

“We get it, Taeyong. Your feathers are ruffled. I’m sure you can get the new kid to smooth them out for you next time you see him,” Doyoung says shortly. Youngho laughs silently. Taeyong always found a way to hate every person he finds attractive. It’s like he’s still stuck in middle school days of pulling pigtails.

“I was just saying,” Taeyong mumbles, bringing a hand up to thread through his over-processed hair. He looks over at Youngho, who’s eyes are glued to the door once more. “Anyway, what’s got you so distracted tonight?”

“Youngho’s still pining over Ten but won’t do anything about it. Doesn’t think he has a chance.” Doyoung answers for him flatly.

“We’re not having this conversation again,” Youngho says, pulling his phone out of his pocket.

“Guess we don’t have to, because look who just walked in,” Taeyong says with a smirk. Youngho twists his head up, eyes trained on the entrance to the living room. He jolts when his gaze finds its target, mouth falling open, almost dropping his phone in the process.

“Well damn,” Doyoung says with a drawl. “Guess Youngho’s not the only one trying to get some tonight.”

“No kidding,” Taeyong says, an awed look on his face. “Glad I’m not you, Youngho.”

Youngho gulps, suddenly feeling like he can’t get enough air through normal breathing. His mind goes back to the first time he’d ever seen Ten, that night at Yuta’s apartment after his exam. He’s just as speechless now as he was then.

Standing in the doorway are Yuta and Ten, smiles on their faces as they greet Jaehyun next to the speakers. Ten’s in the loosest, sheerest white shirt Youngho’s ever seen, open at the chest to show an expanse of smooth, tan skin. His shit is tucked into tight leather pants (“ _LEATHER! PANTS!_ ” Youngho’s brain supplies), the bottoms shoved into a pair of black, beat up combat boots.

He looks gorgeous, just as gorgeous as he does right after a shower, wet hair sticking up everywhere as he pulls a sweatshirt on over a t-shirt and workout shorts. Just as gorgeous as when he’s dressed in a suit and tie to give a final presentation in a class that Youngho still doesn’t know the name for, despite Ten telling him over and over. Just as gorgeous as when he sends Youngho a selfie holding a kitten at the shelter Ten volunteers at, soft laughter on his face as the kitten mews, wanting to be set back on the safety of the ground.

Ten makes eye contact with Youngho then, his face immediately lighting up as he makes his way over to where Youngho, Taeyong, and Doyoung stand. Yuta stays behind, clearly on the lookout for the elder Jung as he continues to speak with Jaehyun.

“Wow, three of my favorite people all in one place!” Ten says cheerfully once he gets within earshot. He’s wearing eyeliner. Youngho can see Ten’s nipples through his shirt. This is hell.

“Hey Ten,” Taeyong says with a laugh. “Went all out tonight, huh?”

“You know I never miss an opportunity to dress up,” Ten says with a grin, tilting his head to the side. The long earrings he’s wearing sparkle even in the dim light. Youngho lets out a garbled laugh in response, unable to keep it inside, following it up with a cough into his fist. Ten turns to him at the sound.

“Hi, Youngho,” Ten says softly, almost shyly. “Are you having a good time so far tonight?”

“Er.. I—yeah, it’s been fine,” Youngho mumbles back.

“ _Better now that you’re here_ ,” Doyoung chirps in a mocking, high pitched voice to the side. Youngho doesn’t react from the neck up, but stomps his foot down on top of Doyoung’s shoe, quick as lightning. Taeyong’s bent over giggling, one hand over his mouth, one hand reaching for Doyoung, who is similarly curled forward after Youngho’s attack.

“We’re gonna go grab another drink,” Taeyong says, gasping for breath, muffled laughter still audible over the music as he drags Doyoung towards the kitchen.

“That was weird,” Ten says brightly, a few moments of silence later after it’s clear Youngho doesn’t currently have the ability to speak. “I’m so glad you’re here, though! It feels like we only see each other at my apartment. It’ll be fun to let loose a little tonight, right?” The blinding smile returns.

“Right,” Youngho replies. “It’s—uh, it’s been a pretty rough week, so some time with friends is just what I need.”

“Good!” says Ten. “I think I’m gonna go grab a drink myself, actually. I’ll see you again soon, okay?” Ten places a hand on Youngho’s bicep, whose brain is dangerously close to short circuiting.

“Okay,” Youngho repeats, and in a flash, Ten’s form is flouncing away from him in the same direction as Doyoung and Taeyong.

“Sweet baby Jesus,” Youngho exhales, closing his eyes and tilting his head back until he feels it hit the wall behind him.

“Rough life, huh?” Youngho cracks an eye open, Yuta’s smug face closer than Youngho would like it to be right in front of him.

“Why does he do this to me,” Youngho groans. “I don’t deserve this.”

“You’re not the only one affected by Ten’s dazzle, my friend,” Yuta replies, patting Youngho’s arm in condolence, right where Ten’s hand rested just minutes before. “Look, it’s the same with Taeil, see?”

Youngho looks across the room to see Ten, a full drink in his hand now, with his arms wrapped carefully around Yuta’s friend from club soccer. Ten pulls back, a wide grin on his face as he excitedly chatters with Taeil. Taeil nods to whatever Ten is saying, a warm look on his face.

Youngho’s body grows cold. “Right. Duh. Just the same,” he mumbles, tearing his eyes away from the scene and taking another sip of his drink.

“Other fish in the sea, Youngho!” Yuta says brightly, a mischievous smirk on his lips. “I’ll catch you around. Still have to find my girl.”

“As if she’s _your girl_ ,” Youngho replies. After an entire year of Yuta chasing after Jaehyun’s sister, Youngho wonders if Yuta has even less of a chance at love than Youngho does with Ten.

Yuta just grins, clapping Youngho one more time on the shoulder, and takes off into the mass of people on the dance floor. Youngho sighs, stubbornly keeps his eyes away from the corner of the room Ten and Taeil currently occupy, and downs the rest of his drink.

 

  
☤

 

Youngho finds himself loosening up after his second and third drinks enter his body. Empty cup in his hand, he makes his way in between sweaty, dancing bodies towards the kitchen again, but he’s stopped just before he makes it out of the mass of people. A hand catches his lower back, and Youngho turns around in surprise at the touch. In front of him is a slightly shorter boy with delicate features and plump, full lips that curve in a smile once they make eye contact.

“Hi,” the boy says, eyes twinkling up at Youngho. “Youngho, right? I think we have a class together. With Professor Woo?”

Youngho doesn’t recognize him, but nods regardless. “Right—Applied Econ, right?”

The boy nods, pleased. “I’m Jungwoo,” he says, sticking out his hand.

“Er—nice to meet you, Jungwoo,” Youngho says, hesitantly reaching out for a handshake, even though they’re in the middle of a dance floor and his head is starting to pound thanks to the heavy bass shaking the floor beneath him.

Jungwoo doesn’t let go of Youngho’s hand. “Wanna dance?” Jungwoo asks, and Youngho’s immediate thought is _no, you’re not Ten_ , but he stops himself before voicing a rejection. This is exactly what he came here for, especially since Ten hadn’t so much as glanced Youngho’s way ever since their first conversation of the night.

“Sure,” Youngho replies determinedly, letting Jungwoo pull him back towards the middle of the dance floor. Jungwoo presses his body up against Youngho immediately, moving his hips to the beat of the music and raising a shy hand to curl around Youngho’s neck. Youngho smiles down at Jungwoo and lets himself relax, wrapping his arms loosely around Jungwoo’s lower back. This is simple, easy. Youngho can do this.

After a few songs, Jungwoo twirls around so his back is flush against Youngho’s front, pulling Youngho’s arms to his waist as he swivels his hips backwards. Youngho brushes his sweaty bangs away from his face, looking out at the crowd around him now that he doesn’t have Jungwoo’s sweet smile to focus on.

His eyes trail along the edge of the room, spotting Jaehyun chatting up a tall girl with a slicked back ponytail, looking a little bit out of his depths. Youngho laughs to himself, figuring it’s time Jaehyun faces a little bit of a challenge. His gaze sweeps over the group next to Jaehyun before locking with the one person looking back at him.

 _Oh._ Ten stares at him with an expressionless face, jaw set and posture rigid. Taeil is still by his side, but is wrapped in an animated conversation with a girl with bright red hair.

Youngho stops dancing in surprise, which causes Jungwoo to turn his head back towards Youngho, a questioning look on his face.

“Everything okay?” Jungwoo asks lightly, bringing his arm back around and caressing the side of Youngho’s face with a cupped hand. Youngho looks down at Jungwoo briefly before flashing his eyes back to Ten. A wave of hurt passes over Ten’s face, his arms curling up around his body almost involuntarily.

“Uhh,” Youngho stalls, his eyes still on Ten. Taeil turns to Ten then, following Ten’s gaze to where Youngho stands. A stony glare takes over his features. He says something to Ten, his words clipped. Ten shakes his head and starts walking towards the front door.

“Youngho?” Jungwoo says, and Youngho snaps his eyes back to the boy in front of him, whose eyebrows are creased in concern.

“Sorry, Jungwoo, but I’ve gotta go. Need some fresh air,” Youngho says hurriedly. “Great to meet you,” he finishes with an apologetic smile, not waiting for an answer before he quickly pushes his way towards the entrance to the house.

Youngho throws the front door open, cold air smacking him in the face. The sweat around his hairline feels disgusting, so he wipes at it while he looks around the yard for Ten. Youngho spots a figure sitting just at the edge of the property, propped against a stump that sits nestled right next to a row of hedges that line the sidewalk.

“Ten,” Youngho breathes as he rushes down the stairs and over to where Ten sits, his head tilted towards his lap, his arms crossed against his chest.

“Ten,” Youngho says again when he’s crouched down next to the stump. Ten steadfastly ignores Youngho, turning his head so that Youngho can’t make eye contact with him. “Are you alright?” Youngho reaches out to touch Ten’s arm.

“I’m fine, Youngho.” Ten says sharply—too sharp, like he’s trying to overcompensate for something with his voice.

“I—I saw you inside. You looked upset—I just wanted to make sure everything was okay,” Youngho stammers, his hand wavering inches from Ten, unsure if he should touch the boy or not.

“Why would you care anyway?” Ten mutters, shifting slightly. The way he’s sitting on the cold dirt can’t be comfortable, Youngho thinks.

“I—what? Of course I care, Ten. You’re one of my best friends,” Youngho says.

“Friends. Right,” Ten says. “If we’re such good friends, why didn’t you tell me about your boyfriend?” Youngho sees the edge of Ten’s chin bunch up, quivering.

“Boyfriend? You mean Jungwoo? I just met him tonight,” Youngho says, confused. “I tell you everything, Ten. You would know if I was seeing someone,” he mutters quietly. If only Ten knew the only person Youngho wants to see is sitting right in front of him.

Ten doesn’t reply to that. Youngho sighs, not wanting to push anything even though he has no idea what is going through Ten’s mind. He lowers his body from a squat so that he is sitting next to Ten. He looks at Ten’s bare arms, and sees goosebumps cover their surface as a breeze sweeps across the yard. Youngho shrugs off his jacket and drapes it over Ten’s body as best he can, considering Ten is turned as far away from Youngho as possible.

Ten glances down at Youngho’s jacket, and the move means that Youngho can finally see just one of Ten’s eyes, which looks glazed over in the moonlight, his eyelashes damp and clumped together as he blinks once, twice.

“Do you like him?” Ten’s voice is barely more than a whisper. There’s something vulnerable in the way he says it, still refusing to make eye contact with Youngho.

Youngho frowns, picking at a hangnail on his thumb. “No,” he says after a moment. _There’s no time like the present_ , Youngho thinks to himself, and it helps that there’s liquid courage warming him from the inside right now.

“I—I do like someone, though.” Ten doesn’t make a move, his body like stone. Youngho takes a deep breath in. Out. In. Out.

“You,” Youngho stammers, the word cracking as he forces it out of his mouth. Youngho’s gaze is locked on the side of Ten’s face and he watches as Ten’s eyes widen in shock. He takes a breath and seems to hold it, before finally releasing the air trapped in his lungs after Youngho doesn’t say anything else.

“You do,” Ten says flatly, finally looking over at Youngho. His eyes look even waterier, and Youngho wants nothing more than to reach out and wipe the tears away.

“Yeah,” Youngho breathes, his heart pounding. He feels like his chest could burst, but there’s one thing he doesn’t understand. “But why are you so upset? Did I do something?”

“Yes, you idiot!” Ten blurts, face twisted. “You made me like you! After all this time we’ve spent together—I really thought—I thought we had a chance, that maybe one day you’d like me back, and that you’d ask me out, and we could go on dates and I could hold your hand and you would look at me the way I look at you!” Ten lets out a noise of total frustration, curling his fingers in on themselves so that his nails press into his palms, hitting his thighs with his fists.

Youngho stares.

He’s having a tough time processing the words Ten just spit at him, because none of them sound like the truth that Youngho has come to know as his reality. Youngho spends so much of his life telling himself that there is no way Ten could feel the same way that he does that hearing Ten confess makes Youngho short of breath. In the very back of his mind, Youngho wonders why Ten is so angry if he likes him back.

Youngho doesn't know how much time has passed—it could have been 30 seconds or 10 minutes—before he finally finds the ability to speak again.

“You.. what?” Okay, Youngho never claimed to be good with words.

Ten glares at him and sighs before beginning to speak again, enunciating his words slowly and with enough heat behind them to make Youngho shiver.

“Ever since we met, I’ve spent every single waking moment with you trying to get you to realize that I like you, Youngho. I flirt with you constantly. I touch you. I cook for you. I even washed your smelly practice clothes for you!” Youngho flushes. He hadn’t asked Ten to do his laundry, but he’d needed clean clothes for the next day. “And then you decide to tell me you like me now, right after you were dancing with another boy right in front of me! Why are you acting like this is all so unbelievable?” Ten says exasperatedly.

“I thought you were just trying to be nice,” Youngho says meekly. “Yuta wouldn't shut up about how you acted the same way with everyone, that—that the way you acted with me wasn’t anything special. And then I saw you with Taeil tonight, and, well…” Youngho trails off.

“I’m going to kill him,” Ten grumbles under his breath before shifting his body so he’s faced straight towards Youngho.

“Listen carefully, because I’m only going to say it one more time tonight, dumbass. I like you. I’ve liked you since the day we first met each other. I dressed up tonight because I knew that you would be here. I even liked you when I saw you dancing with that stupid kid tonight, which is why I’m out here in the freezing cold making a fool out of myself right now. Yes, I am a touchy person—and yes, I try to, you know, be a decent human being towards others—but I don’t feel the way I do about you with anyone else,” Ten says in a rush. He finally takes a breath, closing his eyes as he does.

“Taeil and I have known each other since middle school. He was the first kid I met in my neighborhood when my family moved here; he’s practically my brother. So excuse me for wanting to say hello to him tonight,” Ten says, flicking Youngho’s arm with a slender, strong finger.

“I didn’t know that!” Youngho whines, but he can’t help a smile from spreading across his face, his whole body finally relaxing as he permits himself to finally believe everything that Ten has said to him over the past few minutes. “You really like me?” he says, reaching over to grab Ten’s freezing cold hand.

“I told you I’m not saying it again tonight,” Ten replies stubbornly, but he’s not able to conceal a grin in response, not even by biting his lip. And, well, that action sends Youngho down a path of thoughts he’s tried to fight off for weeks.

Before his mind can wander too far, Ten squeezes his hand and says, “Now that we have all of this done, can we please go back inside? I’m losing feeling in my ass.”

“I can help you out with that, you know,” Youngho says, pulling them both to their feet.

Ten rolls his eyes. “That’s a pretty big turnaround, considering you’ve only known I like you for about five minutes,” he says, brushing dirt off of his jeans. “But glad to know I don’t have to spell everything out for you.” Ten shoots Youngho a wink before pulling him by the hand back towards the house. Youngho feels a little dazed, a little turned on, and so, so, so very in love.

 

  
☤

 

“How many times do I have to tell you, Yuta. She’s not into younger guys,” An exhausted and decidedly drunk Jaehyun says tiredly before flinging open the door to his room at two in the morning, Yuta trailing behind him and sulking because Jaehyun’s sister once again hadn’t given him the time of day.

“I just want her to give me a chance,” Yuta whines. “Just put in another good word for me, Jae—ouch!” Yuta slams his face into the back of Jaehyun’s head, who hasn’t moved past the doorway.

“What the fuck, dude? Why’d you stop?” Yuta says, scrubbing at his (now quite sore) nose.

“Um,” Jaehyun says.

Yuta peers over Jaehyun’s shoulder and widens his eyes at the sight before him.

“Oh, hey guys,” Ten says from where he’s perched on Youngho’s lap, his hands tangled up in Youngho’s messy hair. “Is the party over? We’ll head out soon,” he says with a look down towards Youngho, who nods in agreement, looking slightly dazed. Ten’s lips are red and bitten, and Youngho’s shirt is stretched at the neck, small pink bruises littering his skin.

“Yes. Please. Do that,” Jaehyun says with a sigh. This isn't what he expected to run into at the end of the night, but with his group of friends, nothing surprises him anymore.

“Sorry!” Ten chirps, sliding off of Youngho’s lap and smoothing his top out before he latches eyes with Yuta and his entire demeanor changes.

“You! I have a bone to pick with you, you ass,” Ten spits, shoving a pointer finger in Yuta’s face. “Why did you tell Youngho I didn’t like him? I _told_ you I thought he was cute!”

“Yeah, and I didn’t think he’d be brainless enough to believe it!” Yuta hisses back. “I mean sure, at first I didn’t want him anywhere near you, but after I saw the two of you shooting each other those lovey dovey looks all the time I figured he’d put two and two together.” Yuta makes a face crossed between disgust and disappointment in Youngho’s direction, but Youngho can’t really find it in himself to care.

Ten glares at Yuta, narrowing his eyes. “You are so dead, Yuta. Not a single girl at this university will come within five feet of you once I’m done. Or boy, for that matter,” Ten says with a snarl.

Yuta groans. “Come on, man! It isn’t my fault you fell for a boy with rocks in his head instead of a brain.”

Ten frowns and puts his hands up to cover Youngho’s ears. “Don’t listen to him, he’s just butthurt that he’s gonna be alone with his hand tonight, unlike you.”

Youngho chokes out an involuntary groan and thanks the forces that be for Ten’s glorious existence.

“I can’t deal with this,” Jaehyun mutters, grabbing a towel from his closet. “I’m taking a shower, and if any of you are here once I get back into this room, you’re dead,” he says flatly before leaving his room.

“Night, Jaehyun!” Ten says cheerfully, waving at Jaehyun’s back as it disappears around the corner. “Prepare for two years of celibacy, Nakamoto. Maybe it’ll do you some good,” he says, turning to Yuta with the sweetest smile. Youngho feels all the blood in his body rush towards his crotch. He likes a man on a mission, what can he say.

Yuta sighs but doesn't reply as Ten grabs Youngho’s hand and drags him towards the door. This is the last time he ever gets involved with another person’s love life. “He’ll calm down eventually,” Youngho whispers to Yuta as they pass.

“Not before I tell Jaehyun’s sister all about Taeyong’s birthday night,” Ten quips back over his shoulder smugly.

Yuta bangs his head against Jaehyun’s dresser and Johnny lets out a loud laugh that echoes down the hallway. Yuta really is doomed.

“See you later, man,” Youngho calls before speeding up to throw his arm over Ten’s shoulders. Ten turns to press his lips against Youngho’s check, and Youngho feels the lightest he has in a long time. When the pair start the trek back to Youngho’s apartment, the air doesn’t seem so cold anymore— _in fact_ , Youngho thinks as he smiles down at Ten, _it really is quite refreshing._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you so much for reading! as i mentioned, this is my first foray back into writing in a very long time, so apologies for how rusty i am (reading it back, the first and second chapters hardly seem to be part of the same story, but. u know. oh well). thank you all for your lovely comments; they mean the world to me!!
> 
> p.s. plz someone write me a luyong (?) badminton au
> 
> p.p.s. i might follow this up with some smut but Who Knows


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